Album: Cry Baby

It all started out with me listening to Halsey's Colors, I've listened to this long time ago but then I decided to just go back and listen to it again after so many years (is it really that long?)

Then I saw comments BUT honestly I can't remember how I found Melanie.  But the comment section This is so bad and I feel like a bad fan I can't even say I am one.  But it happened earlier this year and I found her and I learned about her style of music and how she made them, she plays guitar, she writes poem and that basically leads her to writing songs and lyric and that I think is an awesome thing ever and she's cute and her sense of fashion is cute yet creepy but I love it anyway.  It even made me wanted to try that kind of hairstyles and colors, I wanted to dye my hair with two different colors and wear a nose ring.  OMG I really do want to wear my make up like her (just that I don't really wear make up)

Tracklist

Tracklist

1. Cry Baby

2. Dollhouse

3. Sippy Cup

4. Carousel

5. Alphabet Boy

6. Soap

7. Training Wheels

8. Pity Party

9. Tag, You're It

10. Milk and Cookies

11. Pacify Her

12. Mrs. Potato Head

13. Mad Hatter

Deluxe Edition Tracklist

14. Play Date

15. Teddy Bear

16. Cake

I super glad that I found her and her very first debut album called Cry Baby.  It even comes with a booklet telling stories about a character named Cry Baby and it is written in poems and the stories are told in songs and the poems are written based on the track list and there's illustration in which Melanie would love to have that kind of drawings drawn to her body.  Honestly, I'm not a fan of vintage dolls, western dolls, not sure how the dolls look like in my place many many years ago but the way she involved the dolls in her art piece is just weirdly pleasant looking and I don't mind at the sight of the dolls.  They're creepy.

Out of the tracks, I first listened to Pity Party or was it Pacify Her?  I watched the MV first before listening to the whole album.  I like Pity Party especially the part where she loses her mind and says

"I'm laughing, I'm crying, I feel like I'm dying"

This part pretty much explains my emotion back then, and I guess that is why I love this song.  Again it was about my workplace issue and my own inner conflict.

The MV explains the song well, and so is her other MVs.  I like MVs that really have the relation to the title of the songs or the whole story of the songs.  It just gives me the impression of the music being high quality and effective.

Her messages are coming for me.  She really reaches out and we understand her and her stories.  I watched her lives, interviews and The Voice she was in and I fell in love with her version of La Roux Bulletproof.  I DO LOVE IT A LOT.  It is just so manja and sexy.  Never would I have thought that that song could be so sexy.

I love the whole album despite I have my favorite.  I can say that her first album is perfect.  She has a lot work to do for the second just to top her own record of the first album.  It is well organized.  Her ideas and concept can be seen through the whole album.  She introduces a character, Cry Baby which I believe it is her own self and other minor characters like the boyfriends, her family members or at least her other self's family.  The stories go on from one song to another and also a few side stories like the Mrs. Potato.  She conveys her ideas and opinions through tracks like that but it does not go too far from her main concept.

I like the lyrics of course and how they are poetic and just easy to sing along and I have fun figuring out her songs both by the comments and my own interpretation.  She is indeed an artist.  She makes art and I am so glad I found her and I wish she makes more and more good art in the future.  I hope I can own her physical album and if she ever writes books I want them all and woa PLEASE WRITE SOME!  This may sound silly but because of her I once had the urge to make songs too.  But I don't even play musical instrument so I'm gonna just leave that side of me here.  It's funny right how we can be influenced, how I can be influenced like this.  

I like the stories behind every tracks of hers.  For instance, Training Wheels is about the girl having the intention of stepping to another level of relationship and the MV portrays that in a child's play situation: she wants the boy to take off the training wheels of the bike.

It's genius. 

Soap is about how you wish you didn't say some words (You know words that make you seemed stupid and feel stupid and make you feel regretted) and you wish you can wash your mouth for saying it.

"Why do I always spill"

And yes, I don't need to talk about her vocal, I like it and I like it a lot, husky and raspy and she can sing.  Her stage attitude is the one I like too, like how Gerard Way and Katy Perry would on stage.  I really am bad at describing huh hahhah

here is a few bits on her vocal not arranged by me obviously

She has cute dance style too hahhah!
But ya you should check out her Pacify Her video
They call it noodle dance ahhaha LOVE IT
of course I love everything about her right??

She did a lot of covers too
CHECK THEM OUT

Look at that tooth gap, super cute

My favorite songs are Play Date, Pacify Her, Alphabet Boy (I love how she plays with words here)

She has a lot of MVs from this album and I love it when singers made a lot of MVs out of their tracks because I want to see more of them in action together with the songs.

Pacify Her

Cry Baby

Dollhouse

Mrs. Potato Head

Alphabet Boy

Carousel

Sippy Cup

A LOT RIGHT?

The best part of making of these videos is that she directs them herself.

She even has perfume commercial.  Cute one!

• Instagram
• Official Site

OMG THIS IS BASICALLY ABOUT MELANIE AND NOT HER ALBUM
HAHHA

P/s: She inspires me up to the moon, I wish I can do something like her.

Journal: Of the many things I couldn't say

“I'm afraid my voice is going to break. I am afraid she is going to hear how much this hurts.”

― Holly Black, Red Glove

Sensitive people are the most genuine and honest people you will ever meet. There is nothing they won’t tell you about themselves if they trust your kindness. However, the moment you betray them, reject them or devalue them, they become the worse type of person. Unfortunately, they end up hurting themselves in the long run. They don’t want to hurt other people. It is against their very nature. They want to make amends and undo the wrong they did. Their life is a wave of highs and lows. They live with guilt and constant pain over unresolved situations and misunderstandings. They are tortured souls that are not able to live with hatred or being hated. This type of person needs the most love anyone can give them because their soul has been constantly bruised by others. However, despite the tragedy of what they have to go through in life, they remain the most compassionate people worth knowing, and the ones that often become activists for the broken hearted, forgotten and the misunderstood. They are angels with broken wings that only fly when loved.
― Shannon L. Alder

“There are certain children who are told they are too sensitive, and there are certain adults who believe sensitivity is a problem that can be fixed in the way that crooked teeth can be fixed and made straight. And when these two come together you get a fairytale, a kind of story with hopelessness in it.
 I believe there is something in these old stories that does what singing does to words. They have transformational capabilities, in the way melody can transform mood.
 They can't transform your actual situation, but they can transform your experience of it. We don't create a fantasy world to escape reality; we create it to be able to stay. I believe we have always done this, used images to stand and understand what otherwise would be intolerable.”
― Lynda Barry, What It Is 

Highly sensitive people are too often perceived as weaklings or damaged goods.  To feel intensely is not a symptom of weakness, it is the trademark of the truly alive and compassionate.  It is not the empath who is broken, it is society that has become dysfunctional and emotionally disabled.  There is no shame in expressing your authentic feelings.  Those who are at times described as being a 'hot mess' or having 'too many issues' are the very fabric of what keeps the dream alive for a more caring, humane world.  Never be ashamed to let your tears shine a light in  this world.

- Anthon St. Maarten 

Thanks and credit to whomever gather this quotes 

goodreads

But I believe I make no trouble with them surrounding me.  I don't make faces, I don't skip a day without talking to them, there's always the aftermath feelings of what ever occur to me that breaks me down.  I'm goofy, trust me  But here I am, strangers can see through me, I'm said to be self motivated, an yeah he's right, I picked myself up.

I'm not surprised
Not everything lasts
I've broken my heart so many times,
I stopped keepin' track.
Talk myself in
I talk myself out
I get all worked up
Then I let myself down.
I tried so very hard not to lose it
I came up with a million excuses
I thought, I thought of every possibility
And I know someday that it'll all turn out

                                            - Michael Buble Haven't Met You Yet

Ya I expect many things from them cuz I thought it's normal *sigh* I envied looking at others' friendship, how strong they are, how cool they are, how awesome they are, how theyre gonna look back together and how stupid or cool they were,  I don't have this.  We skipped what I thot the crucial time of a friendship lives, the teen time idk,,,and now we're no longer teens.  What we should experience, what we should learn, what we should be talking about and more, we don't have that.

I'm the type who would be my friends' biggest fan, I'm obsessed about their lives, wanting to know what they've been through, the types of guys they wish to be with, the kind of girls they wish to be, I want to know what they think of my playlist (but too afraid to show, reasons of not showing my writings), I'd read their journal and blogs and wait for their updates, like all of their uploaded photos on instagram, fbs and I wish they have youtube or vine ahhahha, I'll be the first to share!  I want somebody who I can be mad at but they won't be mad for long, I want to be with friends who criticize my Rihanna but listen to Rihanna's badass songs anyways, friends who would buy me crazy gifts and I would return the favor with crazier gifts but it's me who would be the first to give so heheh, Friends who I can get matching tattoo with! This kind but of course we won't! Haramm!  Friends who let me colour my hair, do what I dare, criticize me but they do the same anyway and laugh their butts off.,go getaway together, when they don't understand me, they ask. Friends who are comfortable with introducing their soulmate/boyfriends/ or whatever to me, Idk,, I just want to be a part of their love journey, of course not in a bad way, duhh hehe, it's fun I'm telling you, be your wingman (wing girl), I will not b envied cuz I know how you guys are givin me enuf love HAHA.

I'm sorry I kinda drifted away from kpop too, I know how it feels like to be the person at the other end...my friend did the same but I got over with already.  I too have weird friend who only love that particular band and will be quitting when the band is no longer there, that is soo weird.. come on there's so much to love out there!  So much to see and appreciate! It's hard to be a fan, we all know that. I've missed so much of them (that shows, these shows n basically everything), I finally decided to just let it passes me by.  Cuz it upsets and troubles me if I can't have them all, u get me? I still loving them but my discs are always full, I've lost my laptop, the bands are too active, they move too fast for a basic fangirl like me.  I've so many things to do yet so little time.
Ya I want these, I'm selfish I know,
but others can.

But then, they must've think I'm asking too much, get myself a life or anything... I can't do the same since they don't let me in..It's hard. Some people I know, would be criticizing of this kind of person I am, they say "you can always find other friends, don't wait for them", I'm too emotional and all.  Idk,,they are the friends I wish to bring to Akhirah.  This is to 'To the infinity and beyond"

"I'm hurtin baby
I'm broken down"

"I'm right here, 'cause I need
Little love and little sympathy"

 *sigh*

#np Eleena Harris -Die In Your Arms

Oh, I can't help it, I'm just selfish
There's no way that I could share you
That would break my heart to pieces
Honestly the truth is...

Ooh, if there is a reason to call me a fool
'Cause I love too hard